I am in the process of finishing up my 200hr Yoga Teacher Training. One of the principles drilled into us over and over again is to let go of expectations. I think this is a great lesson for pole dancers as well. Over the years I've seen students get frustrated with themselves over and over again because they couldn't do something they "should" be able to do, or they did it last week but can't get it this week.
Ourselves and the conditions surrounding our pole performance are ever changing. Temperature and humidity affect our ability to grip the pole. How well rested, fed and hydrated we are affect our abilities day to day. I am significantly weaker when I am having my period (overshare, I know) than when I'm not, so I just can not expect the same level of performance during that week of the month. I can't fight it, trust me I've tried. So rather than get frustrated at what I can't do, I need to let go of expectations and explore what my body can do. Maybe I work on perfecting a basic spin, or improving my freestyle rather than nailing the newest Instagram fad move.
I think to really enjoy and appreciate pole long term you need to be kind to yourself, enjoy what your body can do, enjoy the process and find your creative expression through dance.